FunmiObi

"If you are going to win the fight of your life, you can't be afraid to fight"  - Eric Thomas Dear Fighter, Life has its ups and downs. There's always some good times to appreciate and hard times to grow through. So, I have chosen to be thankful for life, family/friends, love and issues (makes  life quite a story with the occasional twists), the cool job while I had it, life on a daily... Fight the good fight. Don't be a spectator in your life, fight! Fight for your joy. Fight for your progress. Fight for your dreams, goals, and aspirations. Fight to see the good in life. I realized it, and I'm fighting too. I recently wrote down some of my forgotten dreams and new goals. Now, I think about them often and try to work towards them. It's not easy, but I  have to push for it. In those dark moments, I have found that Jesus is the source of peace.  If you're losing it, it may be that you've distanced yourself from Him. The Bible says that God is leading...

“No human ever became interesting by not failing. The more you fail and recover and improve, the better you are as a person. Ever met someone who’s always had everything work out for them with zero struggle? They usually have the depth of a puddle. Or they don’t exist.” - Chris Hardwick I’m enthusiastic. I love to be associated with success. I like to meet expectations. I just didn’t know if I could stand failing. I was afraid. I prayed and studied and kept hoping every day. I told myself that I had to pass all five of my exams. I felt that was it. Probably if I cleared them all in one sitting, I’d be more satisfied and approved of. Well, I failed one and it hit me. It hurt a lot and I felt like giving up. When I got home, I cried about it but my parents tried to cheer me up. My brother wanted us to celebrate. My friends were congratulating me. Honestly, at that point, I felt they were all crazy or something… In the healing process, I became grateful. I a...

“I feel strongly about friendships. My friends are part of my support system, they mean so much.” Chioma said. I concur. I know I can be rather blunt sometimes especially when it concerns my relationships – God, my family, and friends. In secondary school, I used to tell my friends that I’m the only one permitted to make fun of my brother (whom I wanted to trade at the time). I always take it personally when anyone makes any comment about someone I love. I’m quite passionate if you ask me. My parents are my No. 1 fans. I remember when I called them for a ‘meeting’ and cried and apologized for disappointing them by not being able to get anything doing 2 weeks after school. They just laughed and told me to forget about it. Now that I’m so busy and can’t really help around as much, they cover up for me and help make the process easier for me. When the inspiration to start a blog came, I didn’t have a computer or a very functional phone at the time. I constantly had t...

Life can be like everything happening all at once and sometimes it can be so still and silent like you’re about to fall off the face of the earth (boring, yeah). 2019 came like a rushing wind and threw me off balance. This was the first year in my ‘must-be-organized’ life that I didn’t make any New Year plans of any sort. I just knew that I was going to need a lot of energy and endurance because I kept hearing it over and over again in my head “2019 – My year of energy”. At first, my mum laughed about it as she had never heard such but as the year took its course, I began to see that I really needed all the energy I could get. I enrolled for my professional exams this year and had to balance the classes with work and church training. Well, most days felt like ‘Are we there yet? Can I faint now?’ and sometimes I’d just go ‘Oh, whatever’ and sleep without worries. When I’d remember that I have a phone, I could just take a quick selfie and post it online to show that I’...

“No pressure, no diamonds.” (Thomas Carlyle) A lot has happened since the previous post on distant relationships and a lot of time has passed as well (4 months... phew!). It’s been more of a transition phase for me and I have felt emotions I never thought I would experience. Getting a job came with its excitement but working on the job and trying to maintain balance also came with its pressure. Some days I’d tell my dad that I just want to sleep and I’d keep pressing the snooze button till the sun came up and I’d have to make a mad dash to get ready for work in time.   I thought my life would be MADE by now but I still find myself lost and wanting more... I get under a lot of pressure sometimes and try to take deep breaths and tell myself ‘breathe girl, just breathe, it'll be alright’. I never thought growing up would be like this, it leaves me envying kids whenever I see them play. I’m always like ‘play now o, before you start thinking of getting a job’. ...

I love my best friend, Ozi. She means a whole lot to me but now we've graduated and she’s in Lagos while I’m in Abuja. Back in school, I would invade her room anytime I wished at no transport cost, gist without worries about insufficient airtime, hang out together with our ‘last card’ and watch movies with the lights out (munching a pack of Digestive while watching Edge of Seventeen was a blast!). Now things are quite different... She works so we can only talk when she’s available. I’m job hunting and I get so tired sometimes I forget to call. Recently, I started feeling the distance creeping in and I told her about it. She agreed that it was so we decided to talk about it but when we got talking, we just chattered on like old times. In every relationship, communication is vital more so in sustaining a distant relationship. If you start worrying about the other person and the distance is creeping in, buzz ‘em!  Talk about the past, present, future, i...

"What are we even going to do at home? I need to get job o!" I said. "It's even true, I  can't stay at home and be doing nothing, my parents won't even be smiling with me. Maybe I'll start selling buns in one primary school close to the house" Ada said jokingly and we all laughed in the room. "Abi o! But I would like to just get a job sharp sharp before NYSC and make some money at least" Amara said. As we talked, I couldn't help but think, what's next? So here's what, I just finished up my project, about to graduate from the university and I’m wondering what’s next? How do I get a job now? Will I get a job now??? We're all leaving school gradually. In fact, it's surprising when I get to see any of my classmates still around, we're like 'Hey! What are you doing here?'  And I'm wondering what's next? Well, I've always had my big fancy dreams of being in the corporate world, wor...

I met this guy when I went to buy fruits at night so it was quite dark and we couldn't see each other clearly. We did exchange contacts though it was really awkward trying hold a conversation with him. His language was a bit too much for me to handle (in terms of vulgarity) and I almost yelled ‘language man!’ While chatting, he kept asking me for my pictures so he could see me properly and requested that we become friends. I evaluated the ‘cost’ of having him as a friend and I said no. We had different value systems and I didn’t have the time to start correcting or aligning and keeping in touch. My final exams were only some weeks away, I had my project to think of and ‘friend issues’ and so many other things that were calling for my attention at the same time. If however, we were of like minds, it may have been easier but the first impression was already a disaster and the other impressions after that… I treasure my circle. The people I have in my...

“Relationships are supposed to be about trust…”  ( Sheila in Why Did I Get Married Too, 2010 ) Trust. Total trust. Complete trust… I just decided to give it a try… Not like this was a trust issue but I got insight (the light!) into something else. I was asked to choose between two bottles of water. One was half full while the other was lesser, more like a quarter of the bottle. So, he asked me “Which one do you want?” and I replied “Anyone you give me.” He smiled and gave me the bottle that was half full... Ordinarily, I would've chosen the lesser one (you know... be forming 'humble') and would've been left thinking probably ‘What if I had gone for the bigger one?’ or maybe not. Instantly, a thought flashed through my mind. So many times, we choose the lesser option because we think that’s what God would want us to have or as a sign of humility. But God actually wants us to have the best! Sometimes, we go for the lesser because we ...

We are humans and we know that we are limited in our abilities so we make provisions for such. We can call it the ‘human factor’ or ‘human error’ or whatever we want to call it. When it comes to the subject of love, we tend to also limit ourselves and also place people in our lives on different scales. One will hear questions such as ‘How much do you love me?’ or ‘If you love me then prove it!’ or ‘Do you even love me anymore?’ or ‘I’m sorry. Please don’t leave me.’ I had this mentality too. I could go the extra mile for only a very few set of people who I felt were worth it. I didn't believe that a girl like me could ever be truly and fully loved. This isn't an easy thing to carry along with you into Christianity where you’re told and you read it in your Bible and you’re expected to believe in an all-loving God who will never leave you nor forsake you… in a God who will always show up and will always forgive no matter what… in an everyday kind of lov...

“When life is heavy and hard to take, go off by yourself. Enter the silence. Bow in prayer. Don’t ask questions. Wait for hope to appear. Don’t run from trouble. Take it full-face. The ‘worst’ is never the worst.” (Lam. 3:28-30) Nothing seemed to make sense anymore… Behind on my plans and losing peace and balance was becoming a reality for me though I knew I needed help fast! I knew that I was going to break down anytime soon, as I had a lot on my plate at the moment, but not in public and, at least, not in church service on the same day I thought about it. I knew I needed a retreat to refill, review and re-strategize.  I was running almost empty… Good news: I had the retreat and all went well. I’m much better now, all fired up! After this phase, I got to find out that a lot of people are going through similar situations and are losing strength. Some people feel as though they’re going to break down or die anytime soon, some others feel inadequate whi...

“Pay close attention, friend, to what your father tells you; never forget what you learned at your mother’s feet. Wear their counsel like flowers in your hair, like rings on your fingers.” (Proverbs 1:8-9) This verse of Scripture kept coming to my head after reading it anytime I got into a conversation with my dad or mum during the holidays. It became a thing of reflection for me. Growing up over the years, my parents always told us their stories and pieces of advice either from the mistakes they made, their share of experiences in life or the lessons they learned from their own parents. They always talk about their Civil War experiences and the Igbo culture; foods that have phased out, the games they played and Igbo proverbs… Don’t get it twisted though. It wasn’t all roses and daisies. Some days were really annoying especially when my mum decided to be on my matter. But now I appreciate all the moments as I look back because it helped mould me into a strong...

“I need to get my life in order for 2018. I need a retreat! I need a day off to sit down, think clearly and plan ahead…”*sighs*… With the tide of activities and my mum calling me up and down to do this and to do that in preparation for the Christmas and New Year celebrations (food, food and food), my burden of school work, assignments, my final year project work and my church duties to perform… I must say I felt quite overwhelmed. Truth be told, I lost track. Days ran into each other and I hadn’t gotten anything major done by the 29th (Dec. 2017). I was in dire need of a day-off for my retreat but it just wasn’t happening. Then I got in touch with my Aunty Laraba! My lady in shining armor! She advised me to end my day early and wake up really early (9:00 pm-2:00 am) and get started on my retreat from 2:00 am-5:00 am daily for the next three days. I started off today (slept from 10:30 pm-3:30 am) from 3:30 am-5:30 am and it was A-M-A-ZING! (although the tim...

So... like play like play, 2017 is coming to an end (someone said that October lasted for 0.05 seconds... lol). All through the year, it’s been from one blessing to another, one problem to another, one day to another, and now we’re finally here counting down 3 days to 2018 and drawing up the resolutions which we hope to follow through the next year. Truthfully, I never thought that Nigeria would still be peaceful by this time with all we went through this year. From the economic recession to the political dramas to the threats to the Ibos to evacuate the North and the whole clamour for Biafra to the present fuel palaver, we’re still as bustling as ever. Personally, I thought this year was IT. I’d tell my friend that if I didn’t die this year, I wasn’t going to die again! From nervous breakdowns to times of ‘drought’ (literally), I pulled through safe and sound. I actually found myself even more relevant to the people around me because I knew how it felt to be broke...

To leave seemed like the best option. It wasn’t going to be an easy one but I had thought a lot about my dissatisfaction and what I thought was best for me. I did pause to think about my friends, superiors and those who possibly looked up to me. I knew it was going to be a tough one but then, I mattered most or so I thought. So, I decided to pray for God to orchestrate things the way I had thought it out, if He also agreed that it was the right thing for me. I felt real good about it too. After a talk with a close senior friend about my choice, I began to reconsider my actions. Thing is, I decided to look within and I found out that I was actually the one with the problem. I had become stuck up and I just wanted to do my own thing, quite a rebel too. Also, I got to see that God is even more interested in our growth than we are. If He wants you in or out of anywhere, He’ll make it happen because He works all things for our good. I am the apple of His eyes and...

At some point during this break when I wanted to surrender because my internship plans failed, my brother suggested I learn web design online. It seemed like a good idea because I planned going into programming. So, I took it upon myself to learn something new; dive into a whole new world of coding. Well, I'm proud to tell you that I can design a basic (static) website using HTML and some CSS ( I'm getting there small small o! ). Although I do feel as though I could’ve done and earned more, I’m not wasting any time on regrets. I’ve started making plans to advance in my career and as a person. If you want to succeed, you have to define what success means to you. Paint the big picture and start small but never lose sight of the big picture and settle for less. For me, success is becoming more and then giving more. To make an impact in lives... Ideas are big potentials hidden in the mind. Write them down, work on them, and evolve them. Consciously t...